I’ve realized that I DO trust the process of my life, although the urge to get frustrated or play at NOT understanding it are tempting, and sometimes give the feeling of power, albeit twisted and ultimately false. It’s like relaxing into the flow of a larger sense of self – something I’ve been trying to accept for a while. The experience is… a relief, at the very least. Somethings ARE bigger than you, but they don’t always stay like that – you grow to encompass them, and then move on. The part that feels weird is when you don’t want to grow to encompass them, but still want to direct them – I don’t think it works that way.

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